FRIEND: Hey Kent, sorry I had to run yesterday.
FRIEND: So, have you done astral traveling?
FRIEND: How does it feel to do that?
BARDSQUILL: many times I went through preliminary experiences; twice I went full-blown out there
FRIEND: But how does it feel?
BARDSQUILL: going OBE was ok, but the preliminary experiences were rough, even painful
FRIEND: The preliminary experiences, were they involuntary?
FRIEND: Why painful?
BARDSQUILL: yes involuntary
FRIEND: I never knew it could be painful.
FRIEND: Why do you suppose the experience was unpleasant?
BARDSQUILL: being out there isn't painful
FRIEND: What are the possibilities? Where can you go?
BARDSQUILL: but before I went OBE there were years of pre-OBE experiences involving actual energy pulsations
BARDSQUILL: I think I got "changed."
FRIEND: Oh I see.
BARDSQUILL: The first energy wave scared the poop out of me. I thought I was going to die, worse, annihilation.
BARDSQUILL: but over 20 years the pulsations became more tolerable until almost pleasant
FRIEND: Hm. Do you currently go OBE?
BARDSQUILL: Haven't gone OBE since 88
FRIEND: Just remember, there's no such thing as annihilation.
BARDSQUILL: In my case the full-blown OBE happened only twice
FRIEND: I want to read Astral Dynamics soon, by Robert Bruce.
FRIEND: It's theoretical and practical.
BARDSQUILL: OBE requires a conditioning to jump realities that is guarded within us by our fear of death.
FRIEND: If we eliminate that fear... that would be good. No?
BARDSQUILL: I think I had to be changed slowly at the fundamental levels, almost atomic
FRIEND: Fear is always the main burden.
BARDSQUILL: Fear of dying is the master fear from which little fears calve and is a tough bird to tangle with. I've come to believe that somehow this fear keeps us on earth.
BARDSQUILL: You cannot actually defeat fear with will.
FRIEND: Energy work can though.
BARDSQUILL: for me it took literally a series of shocking experiences, what I now believe to be the quickening, that is a fundamental acceleration that I could only handle in small doses.
BARDSQUILL: but over time this shockingness became more tolerable, then....
BARDSQUILL: the final stage was a surrender, totally opposite of the warrior-will thingy.
BARDSQUILL: after all warriors eventually lose
BARDSQUILL: but I didn't just declare, "I surrender." Nope. Life sort of surrendered me, weird.
FRIEND: Maybe you were fighting back something that was actually "good" for you.
BARDSQUILL: Then these beings appeared and said "now is the time," and I went OBE for the first stage anyway.
BARDSQUILL: The first stage of OBE is similar to earth although my body was less bounded by physical 3D laws
BARDSQUILL: Thought sort of moves you through this world, more luminous, but still with natural forms.
BARDSQUILL: Still with form-body identification, but...
FRIEND: Perhaps the astral body vibrates at a different frequency... they say the astral is the world of emotions.
BARDSQUILL: There's another leap into total formlessness, stage two
BARDSQUILL: keep in mind that prior to these events I had to be surrendered, well, beat to a pulp as far as worldly things.
FRIEND: Maybe your surrendering actually allowed the free flow of vital energies.
BARDSQUILL: not easy, I had to kind of fail at living from the standpoint of Western values
BARDSQUILL: I was a tough case, heh.
FRIEND: Yea, it challenges our beliefs and perceptions.
FRIEND: Spiritualists say that beyond the astral level, there is a mental level, and beyond that the divine level. Now maybe there are "sub-levels" too.
FRIEND: The divine level is most likely where there is no form.
BARDSQUILL: The second OBE was a leap into the astral and from there a leap into the formless. This second stage does not allow anything I think of as "myself" to enter within the formlessness, body, emotions, mind, they were not allowed in.
FRIEND: A sub-level would include the "etheric"--the bridge between the physical and astral.
FRIEND: Your thoughts--they are now allowed?
BARDSQUILL: And afterward the brain-mind fails to find good descriptions.
BARDSQUILL: body-mind-emotions are sloughed away to go in there.
FRIEND: You may have reached some of the highest levels--the divine possibly.
BARDSQUILL: but I was nevertheless there. The I Am part of me still was intact
BARDSQUILL: I died.
FRIEND: Died? No, don't think so... there is no death.
FRIEND: You made a visit and came back.
BARDSQUILL: Now I'm back the most mysterious predicament of all, a pisser actually, because I don't know how to hatch again, you know, one...two..three...hatch.
BARDSQUILL: well I do, takes a surrender that in truth I have no idea how to reenact
BARDSQUILL: You see for me I did not in a most saintly way, surrender, in fact when it happened I was a worldly wreck, like I say, life surrendered me.
BARDSQUILL: but I do have peripheral experiences, tain't the same anymore.
FRIEND: So have your experiences helped or hurt you?
BARDSQUILL: little clues here and there, oddities in perception
FRIEND: Sometimes advanced people have experiences such as these--it is lack of knowledge that makes them suffer. Maybe you can look into chakra healing and such to clear away fears and oddities.
BARDSQUILL: yes, I've been on a knowledge quest obsession although more accumulation of earthly knowledge doesn't seem to do what needs to be done
FRIEND: I have OCD. But I am feeling better now... the more I seek healing, the better I am able to cope. Powerful stuff, intended for good, can hurt without knowledge and practice.
FRIEND: Well, academia isn't going to help.
FRIEND: Do you know T.?
BARDSQUILL: Creative quest works better, that is to increase creativity, which spirals away into unknown-ness
BARDSQUILL: yup, know T.
FRIEND: Ever talked to him about this stuff? His reading was helpful for me.
FRIEND: He was very accurate with me.
BARDSQUILL: Been keeping an eye on T. since he was 19.
FRIEND: Oh I see... what do you think of his mediumship abilities?
BARDSQUILL: I think he is clearer channel than me or my generation, I knew he was "in for it." And I tried to help.
FRIEND: What do you mean "in for it?"
BARDSQUILL: He's let me see, more apt by nature to handle the external chaos that seems to happen during stages of transformation.
BARDSQUILL: He's done very well, hasn't been easy
BARDSQUILL: Folks undergoing transformations are sometimes like a cultural sliver.
BARDSQUILL: They get challenged alot.
BARDSQUILL: In most cases.
BARDSQUILL: At Nineteen I knew these challenges were facing him, so I tried to help alert him.
BARDSQUILL: Thing is like I say, he is by nature more apt.
FRIEND: What does apt mean (sorry)?
BARDSQUILL: could be a sign of human evolution at work, he is young enough to be my kid.
FRIEND: I think so too.
BARDSQUILL: By more apt, I mean, something in his nature, that allows this life-forging process to work more smoothly
FRIEND: I ask my guardian angels to guide me whenever I am overwhelmed.
BARDSQUILL: Folks that are evolving draw down a lot of external cultural flak, but T. more or less, is able to declare, "oh THAT!" and go right on without a glitch. Pretty cool.
FRIEND: I get periods of confusion... and then some clearing.
FRIEND: Yea, well, people accuse him of being this or that... these people are ridiculed often by little minds.
BARDSQUILL: the confusion and opposition is actually the most significant part of the deal.
BARDSQUILL: leads to surrender.
FRIEND: You know, somebody once said, and I forget who...
If you are not confused, you are not thinking. :-)
BARDSQUILL: again surrender is a subtle deal, can't just go on the mountain and clench fist and shout I SURRENDER DAMMIT!
BARDSQUILL: tried that, heh.
FRIEND: Ask your guardian angels for help--they exist. I just started doing that... it works.
BARDSQUILL: I do