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Experiencer Biography

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My "experiencer" memories consist of happenings both in the physical wake-up world as well as in the vague, dreamlike realm where memories seem to shapeshift.

Dreamlike experiences: I remember as though in a repeating dream an incident in the Fifties in Utah. My brothers and myself were playing out in the front yard on a summer evening when from over the Wasatch Range to the east came a flotilla of UFOs.

Night fell and as the UFOs approached and hovered overhead we panicked and ran into the house to hide inside a storage closet. The ETs found us and took us outside in the backyard where a "machine" had landed. We were taken onboard.

Not until the 1990s did I confess my recollection to my brothers. To my shock three of them remembered the same dream and in fact gave greater detail. One brother recalls looking around the neighborhood and seeing people everywhere being filed aboard the ships. In other serial dreams I have seen glimpses of what followed after being taken onboard.

Wake up experiences:

At age 19 feeling depressed and confused I hiked up into the mountains east of Salt Lake City into a ravine, Heugh's Canyon, to retreat and meditate alone. On the third night I was sitting by the campfire when I felt a tingling energy which began to build to a crescendo, blinded me and paralyzed me. I reacted with a mixture of curiosity and panic as these incredible waves pulsed through me. Soon the energy became so powerful I thought I was going to die--even worse than death actually--to be annihilated. I mentally and spiritually resisted, silently crying out to God to help me. The force field went away. I confessed this experience to my Bishop. He became frightened and told me that I might be possessed. I reacted in anger, and from then on I made a gradual walkaway from my childhood indoctrinations, a sad departure actually. I became driven to explore beyond--the impact of my experiences had created a new overlay. [Quite amazed to find a photo of the exact place, camped above the waterfall in that dark hollow.]

I felt different, changed. This pulsating energy would return, but in more tolerable dosages, or at least I seemed more able to handle the force. The periodic bouts of pulsating energy eventually led to two OBE experiences. These journies were not activated by plan nor will. I was not involved in any mystical practice. They just happened. The first in the mid-Seventies began with a circle of ethereal beings announcing, "now is the time." Out from my body I went, unafraid, not looking back, trusting. The excursion was astral, a journey through an earthlike world of recognizable but more luminous forms; The second,OBE presented a more potent propulsion into a realm of indescribable light. Did I actually die and return? Sometimes I wonder... I went through perceptual reorientation again which affected my outlook-- even my career. As an art instructor at Fresno City College I began to attempt creative exercises, guided visualizations where myself and students would imagine travels to distant worlds. Sometimes large lecture classes would somehow "lock-in" and experience these "Expeditions."

I went through a lonely phase, cultural disorientation, a dark period of my life including divorce and broken heart. I turned to alcohol. I struggled within a "Dark Night of the Soul."

One of my students, a middle-aged Native American came to my rescue. He built a sweat lodge on by the river on my farm and began to conduct weekly sweats, mostly with other Native Americans. On one weekend a powerful Elder came down from Sacramento. I was invited into the sweat. Something happened to me in this ceremony. I was told that I would leave my current world of perks, my possessions, my job. I would, "get in the wind," to rediscover myself. The instructions of Bill the medicine-man still resound, "as the world speeds up, we must slow down."

This idea I strongly resisted, but amazingly within a few weeks events stacked up. I walked away from my world and went home back up into the mountains of Utah where I found others like myself. In this environment I was finally able to find release from the darkness and addiction. During this healing process I experienced again the "white light," somewhat different than my earlier experiences with energy--much more sublime--perhaps what some refer to as the Kundalini, but what I know think to be a force that is available upon spiritual surrender.

The last ten years of my life although surrounded by family I have been in physical hermitage, seldom traveling away from home. However, I have reached out through the internet as though something whispers inside to do so.

Afterthought:

I have had many UFO sightings, some in the presence of others. For some reason such experiences have always seen incidental, maybe expected. I have never thought such sightings to be that profound or unique, but only secondary to what continues to unfold inside.

Kent Steadman

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